Fear
Before my grandmothers died, they both had dementia. The symptoms of my paternal grandmother were serious, and my uncle and aunt had trouble keeping their eyes on her, because she disappeared once and was found in the woods. On the other hand, my maternal grandmother was sometimes normal. She was a very modest, humble and patient person. I think she was a typical good wife in the past. I spent a lot of times with her, when I was a child. She rarely scolded us, and was very kind.
She broke her leg twice in her old age and had operations. It seemed like that an anaesthesia caused and accelerated her confusion, and created a false sense of an illusion. Strictly speaking, she might not have had dementia. Just she might not have been able to escape from such illusion and dreams. Her recuperative powers of leg was phenomenon on her age. A doctor was also surprised. She wanted to go home as soon as possible to look after her son (in her mind), and it became her motivation to be recovered.
She had an auditory hallucination, and she often mentioned about 'a baby'. After she got a big blood transfusion for an operation, I felt her character was a bit changed. In short, she became naughty and selfish when she wasn't in her right mind. Or was it her real self? The last time I met her, she was normal even though she talked about 'a baby'. She was the grandmother I knew. I thought it might be the last time to see her, and I helped her change into pyjamas. She was really thin and skinny.
After I lost her, I became not sure which was her real self. Did she really become naughty? Or had she bottled up her feelings and emotions, and just became honest to her own feelings? Dementia is what many people fear most. I didn't mind seriously about health when I was in 20's and 30's, but about my parents and myself, now the fear is coming close to reality. I don't want to have dementia and to lose myself, and cause people trouble saying something I am not sure of.
She broke her leg twice in her old age and had operations. It seemed like that an anaesthesia caused and accelerated her confusion, and created a false sense of an illusion. Strictly speaking, she might not have had dementia. Just she might not have been able to escape from such illusion and dreams. Her recuperative powers of leg was phenomenon on her age. A doctor was also surprised. She wanted to go home as soon as possible to look after her son (in her mind), and it became her motivation to be recovered.
She had an auditory hallucination, and she often mentioned about 'a baby'. After she got a big blood transfusion for an operation, I felt her character was a bit changed. In short, she became naughty and selfish when she wasn't in her right mind. Or was it her real self? The last time I met her, she was normal even though she talked about 'a baby'. She was the grandmother I knew. I thought it might be the last time to see her, and I helped her change into pyjamas. She was really thin and skinny.
After I lost her, I became not sure which was her real self. Did she really become naughty? Or had she bottled up her feelings and emotions, and just became honest to her own feelings? Dementia is what many people fear most. I didn't mind seriously about health when I was in 20's and 30's, but about my parents and myself, now the fear is coming close to reality. I don't want to have dementia and to lose myself, and cause people trouble saying something I am not sure of.
